This is one of the most important concepts you can achieve it’s life-changing. If you’ve ever thought to yourself that you’re lacking communication skills. Pick up this book. If you’re looking to develop into a leadership role of any sort, this book is essential.
It was written by Dale, Carnegie in 1936 and who knew that something applicable 1936 would be so applicable in today’s age, the books broken down into four parts. I’m, going to take one concept from each part, which is just a very small fraction of the book and talk about that part.
One is fundamental techniques and handling people. Carnegie opens up the concept saying that he frequently fished and main door in the summer. He says that he’s personally fond of berries and cream, but for some strange reason, the fish like worms.
Think about what others wants
He went into detail saying that he doesn’t bait, his hook with strawberry and cream. He baits it with worms because fish like worms, he doesn’t think about what he wants. He thinks about what the fish want and really in summation he baits the hook to suit the fish.
If you were to be a personal trainer, you’re, not going to look for clients and say hey. I want to build a customer base as your sales pitch you’re, going to say, hey, I want to help you lose weight and I’m going to do that in a personalized manner.
I’m going to struggle with you. I’m, going to sweat with you. I’m, going to be there for you. I’m, going to fight with you and we are going to lose weight together. The key to this concept is really putting yourself in another person’s perspective, seeing through their eyes, seeing what they want and learning how to align what they want with what it is that you want sure this is going to take some creativity and Aligning what you want with the receiving parties once and desires, but always remember you have to construct it through their needs.
You have to make it an eager want for them, or else it’s not going to be effective, because the point is: is they just don’t care? What you want and that’s, the principle of arousing in the other person and eager want part.
The are six ways to make people like you. When’s, the last time, you asked your dentist, how they started school or why they decided to be a dentist when’s. The last time you asked your doctor: how was their upbringing? What was their family like life? Like? Do you even know a millionaire? You know there are millionaires around you all over the place.
Right. Millions of people walk around every day. Thinking their life is the only movie that exists. They’re the star and everyone else is a co-star. They’re, a support role. They don’t realize that every single other person has their own movie, which they’re the star.
How often have you found yourself asking someone how their weekend was, but you really just don’t care becoming genuinely interested in someone’s, life isn’t just about asking how their weekend was and not caring and listening To the mundane stuff, they did if you become genuinely interested in their lives.
This will lead you through conversations like you’ve, never had. Let me imagine listening to a millionaire talk about how they made their first. Five hundred thousand dollars were their first failure where they lost twenty thousand dollars was they are going to love talking about themselves because everyone is playing their own movie.
Even the most mundane occupations like an accountant, can have the most interesting life, and you have no idea because you’ve, never asked them. You’ve, never been genuinely interested in their lives.
You could come to the realization that someone saved someone’s life before or someone broke a window to get a dog out of a hot car. Before who knows? Who knows what you can discover? I mean the the limits are endless.
You’ll, find that after you treat everyone as if you want to genuinely know about their entire story, you’re, going to have very deep-rooted connections and friendships that last a lifetime with them.
How to win people to your way of thinking
That’s. The concept I want you to take from that part has become genuinely interested in other people. Part three talks about how to win people to your way of thinking. Imagine you’re, a cashier at a grocery store and you’re in the manager’s office at the end of the shift.
Your drawer is short some money and you know that you ‘ Ve made a mistake in handing out change throughout the day you’re short $ 20. It’s. The first time you’ve done this before, but your manager is kind of angry.
How to change people without offence
Now your manager is going to start going into how you’re responsible. You were and how I mean you can just hand away money, and then it’s three times as much as you make an hour. The manager is probably going to go into forms of punishment that you could possibly face and that how you probably won’t get ours next week, because you are so careless and reckless and you’ll sit there and take it all Because you don’t know how to react.
Well, the next time you find yourself in a situation where you ‘ Ve made a mistake. I want you to admit that you’re wrong and do it emphatically Carnegie goes into detail. Let’s, say the cashier situation.
If the cashier was in the manager’s office and before it was even mentioned, the cashier starts saying I made a terrible mistake. I feel so terribly I mean. How could I be so reckless and careless with your money? I can’t believe I just handed out $ 20.
I mean you should make me pay four times the amount back, because I was so careless with your money. If you want me to resign, if you want me to go home right now, I will I mean I just feel so terribly about it.
Talk about your own mistake
The manager is likely going to start going to bat for you saying it’s. Not that big of a mistake I mean it’s only $ 20. There’s, no reason to lose a job over it or go home. I mean I don’t want to lose a valuable employee and it’s.
Not like you’ve done it in the past. It’s, not a regular habit, so see. If you make a mistake, if you own the mistake and then try to create ways where you can punish yourself, it’ll get the other person to the point where they feel that they have to defend you.
So, the next time you find yourself in a situation where you are wrong. Instead of trying to defend yourself like you, naturally are inclined to do admit it quickly and emphatically, part four is how to change people without giving offence or arousing resentment.
Imagine you’re a smoker and your brother, your sister, your best friend, said that they wanted to start smoking instead of just diving in the criticism and telling them not to do it and the reasons why they shouldn’t.
Do it really, what you should be doing is telling them about the mistakes you’ve made in how you wish you hadn’t started because it’s so hard to stop it’s addicting, and you Wish you could and that you have an annoying cough when you lead in this way you dive into the realm of empathy, and you really strike a chord with the other person in a way you couldn’t.
If you didn’t start that way and that’s. The last principle I wanted to talk about, which is always talk about your own mistakes. First – and these are just a few of my favorite concepts in the book.
If you’re on the fence of whether or not you should read this book, it’s, an absolute must. It’ll, raise your social IQ, far higher than anyone. You know that hasn’t, read it and don’t forget to subscribe.
If you want to see more achieved, concepts like this, and if you like this book, you’ll, absolutely love the 48 laws of power. Thanks for watching you